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She was only 24, but she had had lots of relationships, and long ones.

The secret for that, I discovered, was that all of them were dated during the same period of 3 years, at the same time.

It meant that if she wanted to call someone, she had to type a password first... Then, wherever she would go, she would always, always take her phone with her: In the toilet, in the shower, in the kitchen...

She would never forget it, and if she did, she would come back in a hurry to get it, and she would ask me, worried: Did you take a look at my phone?

But there is one thing that I feel really helped me heal faster that I haven’t seen talked about elsewhere too much — which is what I want to cover today.

Those “prostitutes” do not look like hookers: They are young, cute, and they seem so nice that it is hard to imagine what is behind their smiles: That doesn’t mean you should stop enjoying your time in Jakarta: If the sex with her is good and you are not emotionally attached, I say don't pay too much attention to it, but then protect yourself and do not fall in love.

: You are an expat living in Jakarta involved in a relationship with an Indonesian girl? We know that the bar scene in Indonesia is very adventurous, and though it is easy to meet a decent girl, you may also end up with someone whose only interest is to suck you dry. There are a lot of expressions to designate these girls but my favourite term is "Professional Girlfriend": Her job, the one activity that earns her revenue, is to be your girlfriend, or to make you believe she is. There are some easy things to spot in her behaviour that will help you guess if she's faking the whole thing or not.

I listed 10 of them and I hope they will help you realize if yours is on the game or not: 1) You in Jakarta: To be honest, if it was a massage parlour, a club in Kota, a bar in Blok M, or a karaoke, there is a 99% chance she is a fake. Your only chance is that she was in such a place by accident, but that never really happens.

There are no reasons to feel ashamed because you love someone, even a bargirl/prostitute, but at one point, you need to protect yourself from your girlfriend because miracles don't happen: Trust your instinct, and make a courageous decision. She doesn't trust you one bit, and never gives you any freedom when you want to go out with your friends in bars or night clubs.

Once again, it's not hard to understand her behaviour: How can you trust someone when you cannot be trusted?

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But implementing the “buyer” mindset means raising your self-esteem. What you need to do is change your behavior and develop new habits that breed a high-value mindset.

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She also said that she has been with a few Jamaican men, and said she preferred Jamaicans "because dem more natural". Sexologist Shelly-Ann Weeks said she is not surprised by the poll results, arguing that some women are trying to find pleasure while some men believe that they are in a competition.

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